Reaching out for support is important for immigrant parents in Canada

For many parents, asking others for help can be uncomfortable, especially if they are recent immigrants without many friends or family nearby. Some are unwilling to admit that they need assistance from others, so they attempt to work it out by themselves. Others do not know how to ask for help or believe that others will not help them.

Some parents might even feel ashamed and guilty for asking for help; they do not want to owe or burden others. And there are others who fear that asking for help will be perceived as being inferior, weak and incompetent.

Plus, many believe that family matters should be kept private, so they keep family problems to themselves and struggle in isolation, hoping the challenges will magically disappear.

Importance for parents to seek support

While it is admirable to want to be self-sufficient, there are times that we, as parents, need support and assistance, as we cannot do it all on our own. Trying to raise a family in isolation simply does not work and can have long-term detrimental consequences for you and your children. Having the ability to ask for help can be beneficial to your family and the community. If we helped each other out more, wouldn’t our world be a much better, friendlier place?

The reality is that our community is filled with caring and compassionate people who are willing to lend a helping hand when we most need it. And it’s just as important to graciously receive help when we need it. Know that those who step up to help you will also benefit, as helpers feel good when they are able to contribute to society. In turn, they may also then seek your help in the future.

How immigrant parents can ask for help

So how do you ask for a little help? Start with a small and simple request, and eventually work out the courage to ask for any bigger favours. Perhaps you ask a parent in your community for advice or to babysit. Choose wisely by selecting people who are caring, helpful, trustworthy and non-judgmental.
Be proactive and take steps to seek help. Do not expect others to know what you need and do not wait for others to offer their assistance, as they cannot read your mind. Be direct, specific and clear, so that others know how to help you.

Everyone needs help from time to time, and asking and receiving help is a sign of strength, maturity and confidence. Remember that it takes a village to raise a child, as the saying goes. So let’s work together and help each other whenever we can, for our children, families and society to reach maximum potential!

-Canadian Immigrant